Meata America

An American Werewolf In Dubai………

http://www.skilletstreetfood.com/baconjam.htm

Comin’ at you from the Mecca of Bacon H8rs… is this little gem from Skillet Street Food. It’s what every growing boy needs on his ( or her if you wanna be PC……. then again….. I DON’T so moving on) toast in the morning! There are lots of recipes out there and most of my colleagues here in the Middle East think I’m crazy…… then again…. I must be to live here!!

Enjoy!

mmmmmmm Bacon……. mmmmmm

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Hey Meatheads! Happy Holidays!  2010 is right around the corner, and I’m working on a few new features for the site. I’m interested in getting some feedback from you, so shot me an email and let me know what you want to see on the site.

Grilliam Steakspeare

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In, what I will call, the greatest viral marketing scheme of 2009, Meata CEO/Director Grilliam Steakspeare, concocted a plan so devious, so creative, so daring, even the sluthiest of the Halo die hards couldn’t see through it.  After seeing a trailer for Halo 3 ODST Steakspeare saw “WE ARE ODST” at the end of the video.  Curious as to whether or not this was the website address, Grilliam quickly went to the site, only to notice the domain name was available.  And just like in the GoDaddy.com commercials, grabbed up the domain faster than that pig in a blanket on Christmas morning!

The plan was simple, direct WEAREODST.COM to MEATAAMERICA.COM in hopes to drive traffic to the site. After about 2 days, the site got over 1,500 hits, from all over the world. It hit blog circuit and was quickly being circulated as a viral marketing campaign by bungie or mircrosoft.

Check out the bungie.net forums to see a small recap of what happened.

So what’s next for Meata’s devious marketing approach.  Well, have you heard of PETA?  That’s right, we have planted PETA in the hearts and minds of millions of Animal Activists and are doing a reverse viral marketing campaign.  It will go down in history as the single most successful viral marketing ever, in the history of reverse viral marketing.  Stay Tuned Meatheads!

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I’ve been sent this project a couple of times, and honestly, it just creeps me out.  Don’t get  wrong, I’m a huge proponent of meat.  In fact, I’d say I’m probably the biggest!  I started a freaking meat website for god sakes!  But this thing popped up in my email from a couple of loyal readers (love you Myles and Ashley) [one is a fake name to make it sound like we have female readers] asking me to post thing on the site.  Now, since I have absolutely zero credibility as a journalist, no ethics as to what I will and will not post, and let’s face it people, I have nothing better to do, I WILL be posting the bacon lamp.  But not in the sense that you might be thinking.

I would like for this post to be more of a “what not to do with bacon.  I will explain my findings below. Read more…

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Well, to be honest, no, we aren’t related to Halo 3 ODST in anyway.  The reason I purchased www.weareodst.com is simple.  I’m in the process of creating a  steak anonymous group called “Over Dosed on Steak Talk” where members can willingly and anonymously share their feelings on Steak Overdose.  It’s a common misunderstanding that many Meataholics are in control of their issues, but the fact is….it’s Genetic, and many people don’t realize how to deal with it.  So join me in my fight to eradicate Steak Abuse, and help usher in Responsible Steak Habits for the youths in this great country.

But then I realized that Overdose is one word, and that screwed up everything.  Kind of like when I bought the domain name www.YesWeCannibus.com but then realized I misspelled Cannabis!  Not my finest hour.

I did however wait in line last night for the release of Halo 3 ODST.  I give it 3 meat thumbs down. The multiplayer is Halo 3…not like close to it, it’s the exact same game! What a ripoff!!!!!

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This is a video from Green-House.tv.  This guy is great.  He’s kind of like me, just less bacon…and I don’t fix stuff….and I don’t recycle….and I don’t live in the north…and well…we really don’t have much in common actually.  But he’s still a good guy.  But props to him for burger cooking.  Also, he made a smoker out of carboard.  He’s kind of like MacGyver for the grill!

Now, what he doesn’t do on here is talk about Bacon.  I think cooking a burger without Bacon is like driving a car without an engine.  I usually throw 5-8 strips of bacon on a burger.  Then I’ll have a side of bacon along with it.  Just finishes off any burger nicely.

1 lb ground beef, preferable grass fed free range, or 85% ground chuck from store

1 clove garlic, crushed or minced

2 tsp Worcestershire Sauce

2 tblsp chives, scallions, onions chopped fine

The trick here is to handle the beef as little as possible.

Start a charcoal fire.

Toast the buns if desired, watch out, as they burn easy. I know this from experience.

Set the beef in a bowl, add the rest of the ingredients, mix lightly.

Form into 3 or 4 patties, depending on size preference. Don’t mash the patties, the looser the better, but still retaining a burger shape.

press your thumb into the middle of each patty. this allows the center to cook at the same rate as the edges.

cook on a hot grill for 3 minutes a side.

if you want cheese, but it on when you flip the burger and cover grill.

Don’t press down on burgers while they are grilling, you’re pressing out all the juices

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As a Bacon Ambassador, my style is fairly limited.  I’m pretty sure my Bacon tank top has turned sour, so I needed to get some threads that honored my craft.  And what did I find?  Well, just about the greatest shirt of all times!

I’m sure most of you go here already on a daily basis, but if not, here is a link to their site.

Bacn.com

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One of the most inspiring hairstyles I’ve seen in a long time, is what I call the “Meat Head”.  Basically, you just drape a steak over your head.  I’d suggest you wear this style at any tailgate party or is just perfect for the late summer cookout.  And the best part is your don’t have to put gel in it, just splash a little A-1 Sauce on your hands and rub it in.

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Trust me, don’t google Meat Curtains if you are looking for this.  Instead, just click here, it’s $19.95 and adds more style to your bathroom those little toilet seat covers.

http://mookiegifts.com/meshcu.html

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Man’s quest to be the biggest, strongest, and fastest has led us to behold some pretty amazing things. Tonight, I was doing my usual google searches for some pretty random thing; alternative bacon usage, beef facts, masters of meat (don’t do this one at work!) and so on.  Well, I decided to search worlds largest hamburgers, and let’s just say, things got a little weird. I found this video on CBS of some dude that spent 4 months making/planning the worlds largest hamburger.  Not only will you live forever in our hearts, and I mean that in the literal sense, with clogged arteries and such, but you will go down in the history books.

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